Return on Life: The Groundhog Day Lesson

I'm not referring to February 2, celebrated as Groundhog Day each year, but to the 1993 movie starring Bill Murray and Andie McDowell. I had seen it when it first came out, but hadn't actually watched it since. My husband and I happened across it this weekend. All I had really remembered (and frankly, ever heard reference to) was that the movie was about Bill Murray getting stuck living Groundhog Day over and over again in an endless loop. I thought of it as a mindless Bill Murray comedy.

As we watched again this weekend, I realized that I had missed the entire message (or at least not retained it). If you haven't seen this movie for awhile, watch it again. What you'll learn is that the reason Bill was stuck on that same day is that he hadn't learned to care or think about others. Once he did--truly, not just by pretending--he was able to move forward with his life. It was all about how he saw things and what he focused on. The movie illustrates one of the five basic attitudes necessary for increasing your Return on Life--have an attitude of love.

Are you feeling stuck in your life--as if it's the same day over and over again? Watch Groundhog Day, and adopt an attitude of looking at what's right in the world, and how you can make the lives of others better. Just as in the movie, it will propel you to a brighter, sunnier future. It will increase your Return on Life!

Return on Life: Let's not lose ground!

I read a scary report today, originally published in the Washington Post. For the first time in a long time, we are beginning to see a shortening of life expectancy. Right now it's being seen more in rural and low income areas, but don't think it can't spread.

According to the report, the "trend appears to be driven by increases in death from diabetes, lung cancer, emphysema and kidney failure. You may know this already, but the drastic rise in diabetes is in large part due to obesity, inactivity and stress. Lung cancer is tied to smoking. And recent research shows that emphysema may be at least partially an autoimmune disease triggered by stress. All of these are under our control.

I find it difficult to believe that, living in a country where we have such freedom in what we do, so many of us choose to be SO self-indulgent, that we're actually killing ourselves earlier than 20 years ago! Believe me, it's not about never eating another donut or running marathons. It IS about making some basic changes that will not make you miserable but WILL make your life more enjoyable and longer.

If you are conscious of eating in a healthy manner and you are active most days of the week, congratulations! Perhaps you can help motivate your family, friends, and co-workers to do the same. If you are NOT eating well and are sedentary, get up right now and go for a 10 minute walk! Then do it again tomorrow. Even small steps help make a difference over time.

We really are at a turning point--as demonstrated by the fact that despite medical advances and access to healthful food and myriad opportunities to stay active, we have begun to succeed in counteracting all of this. Don't become part of the "I'm going to live a shorter life" statistics. Do what you can to be healthy as long as you're here, and you'll help reverse this disturbing trend!

Return on Life: What if YOU won the lottery?

There was a fascinating wire report recently about a man in Wales who had won a $2.6 million lottery jackpot. He had been employed at a McDonald's, and of course immediately quit. Not surprising--who would want to work at McDonald's with a net worth of $2.6 million? Turns out, actually he did. After 18 months enjoying the winnings, he went back to his old job because he missed his co-workers. So many stories of lottery winners have such unhappy endings--money spent within a matter of a few years, drugs and other problems cropping up. My bet is that 20 years down the road, this young man will still have the money (and more!). If he can, within 18 months, adjust to that huge a change in his life, he is centered enough in himself to weather just about any storm--good or bad!

Amazingly, he's only 25 years old, but he has wisdom beyond his years. He returned to the McDonald's job because he missed his old friends. Some of you are thinking "Is he nuts? He could spend the rest of his life just travelling around the world, doing whatever he wanted to do. The whole point is, he now is doing what he wants to do. It just happens to create income for him rather than cost money. For him, that doesn't put his McDonald's job in the undesirable category, and hooray for him for realizing it. I imagine he received lots of suggestions to go the spending route. He was smart enough to realize what made him happy, and return to it, before he lost his way in life. By doing so, he's provided a great lesson in being "self-referent"--looking inwardly for guidance and not letting others get him off track.

Think about it: What would you do if you won $2.6 million in the lottery? What's truly important to you?

Return on Life: Don't Become a Stress Tree!

I recently read a story of a man who had been going through a very stressful time at work. He realized he had begun to take it out on his family. Searching for a way to release the tension before he walked in his home each evening, he settled on grabbing hold of a huge tree in his front yard each evening. He would imagine all of his frustrations flowing out of him and into the tree. He found that this actually did allow him to calm down and be in a normal frame of mind when he walked in the front door. His relationship with his family healed, but there was also another unexpected outcome. Over the next year, the tree (his "stress tree" as he dubbed it) turned brown and died!

I shared this amazing story with a friend. Her eyes widened, and I could see something click in place in her mind. I thought she was going to comment on how amazing this story was, but instead she said, "I've been a stress tree for other people". She had recently ended a relationship that had become a stressful one for her, partially because she had allowed the other person to use her as their "stress tree". My friend is a loving, giving person, but she realized she was taking on more from this person than she was able to handle--she was in danger of turning brown, like the stress tree!

Think about your relationships. We all want to --and should--be supportive of each other. Just be sure not to carry it to the point of becoming a stress tree. If you turn brown, you will no longer be able to support others. Increase your Return on Life by monitoring how much stress you take on, and by finding ways for it to flow back out before it becomes toxic!

Return on Life: Now we have proof of what makes us happier!

A recent Associated Press (AP) article provides proof that doing something for others (including spending money on them) makes us happier than doing the same for ourselves. Researchers at University of British Columbia and Harvard University wanted to build on previous studies (which showed that having more money can increase happiness) by conducting a study looking at whether the way people spent their money made any difference. They found that doing something for others made people happy, which may not surprise you. What could be surprising was the fact that the level of happiness was significantly higher when the individuals in the study did something for others--whether it involved money or time. This effect was noticeable even when small amounts of money or effort were involved.

So, if you want to get more out of life, do something for someone else today, even if you only have resources to begin with something small!

Return on Life: Perspective is critical

I always read the "Dear Abby" type column in my daily newspaper--it's fascinating to read about the interpersonal issues people face and the suggestions for dealing with them. A recent edition provided a great example of the subtle way we transfer responsibility for our emotions and reactions away from ourselves.

Here is the passage: "Many of today's baby boomers suffer hearing loss from listening to loud music or living in noisy environments. It can cause irritability, negativism, anger, fatigue, tension, stress and depression, and can lead to social withdrawal."

Certainly hearing loss may result in these effects, but for most of the items on the list, we are choosing that reaction. That doesn't make those results any more palatable, but it does put them back in the category of things we can control--or at least influence--rather than the category of things over which we have no control.

Think about which terminology you use--are negative results you're experiencing actually caused by an outside influence, or are they caused by your reaction to them? If they're caused by your reaction, direct your efforts to reducing or eliminating those reactions. You'll have less stress, and increase your return on life!

Return on Life: Kids make the best teachers sometimes!

Today's edition of North Journal (March 5, 2008) from Trib Total Media contains a story that illustrates how easy it is to make a difference in the lives of others. Fourth grade students of Kathleen Geigel at Richland Elementary have embarked on "Project Snuggle", which involves making fleece blankets for schoolmates facing tough times. The kids had hear about a similar project at Children's Hospital in Pittsburgh, called Project Linus, where volunteers make the blankets for patients. They were so inspired, they decided to do the same within their school.

We all sympathize with others when they face tough times, and appreciate the kind thoughts of others when we're the ones having difficulty. Ms. Geigel's class, however, shows us how to take it a step further. Their classmates may be dealing with situations they can't control (one recipient is facing surgery, for example), but these fourth graders have figured out what they CAN do to help. Imagine the love that's poured into each and every one of those blankets! Imagine how the recipients feel when they're snuggled up inside! And, imagine how good the kids who made the blankets feel!

What small step can you take today to ease a difficult time for a friend, colleague, or family member? Amazingly, doing something to increase someone else's Return on Life will actually increase the Return on your Life as well!

Thanks, Kathleen Geigel's Richland Elementary Fourth Grade Class, for setting a great example!